Todays episode comes from a heart felt question on MeWe. This came in from a user named Christopher, it was…
“Could you do more on military mindset like you did in Miyagi morning episode 131? I learned more about myself and why I the am the way I am after the marine corps than a lot of therapists could tell me.
I’d just like to hear more stuff on dealing with transitioning into civil life again, military mindset, why we think the way we do. Anything to help understand myself like you did in that episode that made me cry while i was cutting my grass because after years of frustration i was finally able to come to terms with stuff that live been struggling with.”
The episode he is speaking of can be found here, https://www.thesurvivalpodcast.com/miy-epi-7-7-21 and it was really about what could lead to armed resistance. In it I discussed how people who never served tend to not understand the dark humor and seemingly caviler attitude of prior service soldiers.
I don’t want to redo all that today so I will just say a few words about it and then I want to talk about how military service changes the mind set of a person forever. Also this isn’t really about is it for “good or bad”, it is just what is. I am being asked to help people understand how they feel, not judge it today, so that is what I plan on doing.
These are just some of the things that change for many after military service that have to be dealt with in their new civilian life…
- One – A contempt for disorder
- Two – People will never actually understand you unless they are brothers/sisters that also served, a councilor who never served is likely pretty useless in my opinion.
- Three – The world you are in now works on tasks, jobs, etc. not missions.
- Four – No one will ever care as much as you do about doing things “correctly”.
- Five – You may never eat and drink like a “normal person” ever again, believe it or not this can really contribute to alcohol abuse and obesity over time.
- Six – At times you will be lonely, everyone is, but not the way you will be, the key is to learn to be okay with it, do not try to make it go away or think you are wrong for feeling that way.
- Seven – If you saw pain, misery, poverty, etc in the world in a way most will never see, you will never unsee it. This is not actually bad. The conflict is between your training and your natural empathy. Let the empathy win, you are not a solider/marine/etc any longer.
- Eight – This is true for everyone, but the best way to help yourself is to help others like you. It can be by getting in an organization or just having conversations with others who need to do that.
- Nine – If you have fallen from your health as a solider, reclaim it. A healthy body does really help you develop a healthy mind.
- Ten – Don’t judge yourself for how you feel but be your own commander and hold your current standards to a high level in what you can do and can control. And you can’t control how you feel, but you can influence it.
Here is the referenced article I wrote about this published on ITS Tactical – https://www.itstactical.com/intellicom/mindset/coming-home-giving-veterans-space-time/